Taking Back the 22nd

About a year and a half ago, I was out on a date with my (then) boyfriend Joe. We were at this bar downtown Chandler, AZ having a wonderful time—Yummy food, cold beer, lots of laughing… I was loving that giddy feeling one has when on a date with someone she knows she may just be falling for… It was a really great evening.

The check came and he grabbed it right away. Aaah my dashing dining companion. Love that about him. He then motioned for the server to come closer. He quietly and discreetly pointed to a random young couple a few tables away from ours and said “I’d like to pay their tab as well. Please don’t tell them who did it. Just say it was taken care of by ‘someone who wants you to enjoy your night.’”

The server was puzzled, then smiled and went off to transfer the ticket onto ours.

I was just staring at Joe. Well! This was new. What’s he trying to do here? Be this knight who swoops in and buys food for the not-very-poor? This was quite the “move.”  I was alarmingly close to rolling my eyes.

He met my gaze head-on and said, “I am not doing this to impress you.”

Was I that easy to read?

“Oh. Well. Good. I didn’t think that you were!” I said indignantly. And not very convincingly. Because clearly, he was.

“Today is the 22nd,” he said.

“Um. Yes. It is.” I replied. Are 22^nd‘s Free Food Days sometimes?  I wondered.

“Jodi died on December 22^nd. I can say it was the worst day of my life. It was awful. So, I came up with a little something to make it … better. I can make someone else’s 22^nd pretty great. A free meal at a restaurant, giving to a charity on the 22^nd, cleaning up a playground on the 22^nd…. I don’t know. There are a lot of things I can do to make this 22^nd better for a complete stranger. And I know Jodi would have liked that. She was big into complimenting people just to make their day brighter. She loved that kind of stuff.” (I’m paraphrasing here. He probably described this whole ideal a lot better that night).

So he was Taking Back the 22^nd. This made perfect sense. I mean, we can do nice things for people any time, but to do it with purpose, coming from such pain… I totally got that.

I have had opportunities to Take Back the 22^nd both on my own and with Joe. It’s not always buying someone food anonymously at a restaurant. It’s doing something small and memorable for one person to make their day. With no fanfare, no glory. The reward is the smile you know you brought out for them.Even though you won't get to see it.

The kids have all gotten to be part of this at one time or another. We just explain to them that they have the power to make somebody’s day. That’s a huge and wonderful power. And whether it's on the 22nd or not, we should all abuse the hell out of it.